I have always been a firm believer anyone can change if they set their minds to it and really want to change in their heart. Changing yourself is always the hardest goal to achieve. I realized at the end of the year, I no longer wanted to have some of the negative traits I saw in myself. I was seeing that I no longer first saw the good or positive about a situation, but the negative. I realized this was not the example I wanted to set for Zoey. I wanted her to see me as a strong, positive woman, not a negative woman. While I am doing this for her, I am doing it more for myself.
There is so much that come to play that makes us fall into this type of pit. I recongize a lot of them in my life. A handful I cannot readily change due to it is out of my control. Another thing I fall short of, letting go of things I cannot control. Yikes!
To start the year off, I told myself I wanted to be more positive first off. Stop seeing the bad and complaining about every little thing. Surprisingly, to myself, I am accomplishing that. While it might take a while for others to see it, I can tell a difference. I feel "lighter". While I know negative thoughts and feelings can weigh you down, I had no idea how much! It will continue to be a work in progress and there will be bad days, but I am determined not to let that get me down! I can do this!
If you are reading this and see me fall back into my old negative self, please call me out on it. I am still learning how to let go of things and get them off my chest without sounding like I am complaining or being negative. One of my favoite signs I had as a child, which is hanging in Zoey's room today as a reminder to myself when bringing her up, says "Please be patient with me. God isn't finished with me yet...". Oh how this applies even to us as adults today!
